Slow Decay
by Jo Claire
Summary: Draco is torn between doing what is right, and doing what will save his family. HBP spoilers, songfic, K for slight language and violence.


Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter and all affiliations, not I. Dashboard Confessionals own the song, Slow Decay, again, not I.

Slow Decay

_Stand down son, start resting easy_

_You've done your service, I am proud to have you home and see you safe_

_It's so good_

_You look so strong in that picture on the mantle you sent your mom_

_When you were gone_

_But you look scared now, hollow eyed_

"You've done well, my son." This was one of the few times Lucius complimented his child.

"Thank you, Father." This was a standard reply from Draco.

"However, you don't seem pleased. I am hoping that with the death of Dumbledore I will regain my former position among the Death Eaters."

"Yes, Father. The Dark Lord rewards the faithful," a concept that had been drilled into his mind.

***

_When are you coming_

_When are you coming back were you belong_

_I swear that it's safe here, there's nothing to fear at all_

_Come on back were you belong_

_The pressure releases if you just let down your guard_

The Dark Lord applied more force to the boy's mind.

"Open your mind!" The hiss broke Draco's control and Lord Voldemort raced inside his conscience.

Stillness.

"Ah, Draco, you _are_ a very talented boy; no, a man. Yes, Draco, you _are_ the man for the job. Ah, Draco, you _are_ the one who must kill Dumbledore."

***

_Everything rests on you_

_You know that feeling well_

_The ball is falling falling falling_

_So far from a close call_

"Draco, if you kill him, I will be in disgrace no longer! If you do this, we will be great once more! But if you fail, we die."

"I can't kill him." Draco muttered to the floor.

"What was that, boy?"

No response.

"You said you can't kill him. You don't wantto kill him? WHY? He is nothing – NOTHING! You hear me? NOTHING! Damn you! CRUCIO!"

Draco collapsed to the floor, screaming. Lucius laughed as the spell threw his son across the room.

"You FOOL! Wanting to save that mudblood lover!" He cast another spell, and Draco clutched his torso; blood dripping onto marble tiles.

***

_Your injuries aren't mortal wounds_

_The only thing that's killing you is what you must do_

_What you can't stop_

_But you're not the one I blame_

_It isn't your mistake_

Narcissa Malfoy found her son propped against the wall, still bleeding, "Ahhh- Draco. You _know_ you mustn't anger your father,"

"Yes Mother." He managed a gasp.

"This isn't your fault. But you must be the one to fix it, Draco!" She sighed, starting to mutter spells over his wounds.

"Yes Mother. I realize that, now. I must kill him. I have no choice."

Narcissa looked into her son's eyes and saw that he knew there would be more than just one death, the death of the headmaster.

***

_Back where I belong_

_Back where I belong_

_Take me back where I belong_

_Back where I belong_

_Yes, I'm back where I belong,_

_You swear that it's safe here_

_There is nothing to fear at all_

_Take me back where I belong_

Draco was back at Hogwarts. His true home. But now it was more like a prison than a sanctuary. He was "safe", sure. Safe from everything, except Dumbledore himself. Dumbledore, the man whom he must kill.

***

_You're safe now so come on back were you belong_

_I swear that it's safe here there's nothing to fear at all_

_Come on back were you belong_

_The pressure releases if you just let down your guard_

"Draco – you can tell me, I can help." The voice was persuading.

"Look here, Snape, I know what you're doing!"

"Oh, and what is that?" The voice was silky now, and dangerous

"You want to steal my glory!"

"You are acting like a child, Draco! _I can help!"_

There was a pause, and silence reigned.

"Stop it! Stop trying to get inside my head!"

"Just give in you silly boy! _I can make you succeed!"_

***

_It's the simple things, dad, I'm not hurt, I'm not dead_

_I just should be where my friends are lying_

_And I didn't hate those that I killed, but they're all dead now_

_And I'm here alive with quiddich and Friday nights_

_And no one to judge me for the things that I've done at all_

_So how can I live with that?_

Draco clenched his jaw, effectively smothering a scream and snapped his quill. He crumpled the note and threw it in the fire. He had succeeded. He had succeeded in ending Dumbledore's life, he had succeeded at the only thing he had ever wished to fail.

***

_The pressure releases if I just let down my guard_

"Who killed Dumbledore? Who? WHO?" The Dark Lord hissed.

"Milord, I tell you, the Malfoy boy did!" Snape insisted.

"LIES!"

A/N: I didn't want to use the song title for my song fic titles, however I really felt like that's what is going on inside Draco, a Slow Decay. Thank you for reading! Reviews are very welcome, flames as well. Blessed Be - Jo


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